i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
where are you?
Hypothermia
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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