yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
