How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
