Define "chronic" masturbator.
i would punch a child for taco bell
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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