Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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