Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
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