i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
