I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
im drinking this country out of the recession.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
