when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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