What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
