How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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