dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
