actually, I'm a sock model
I wish I could punch you in the face.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
