i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
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