I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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