can we get nightvision for the apartment?
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
