I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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