It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize