you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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