Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Randomize
