youre lurking in front of me
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
as a side note pls kill me
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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