Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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