D3 body, D1 cock
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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