R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
