Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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