Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
