just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
