I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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