I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
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