I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
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