At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
