I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Still dying that you shit outside
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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