I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
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REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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