take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
As shirtless as possible
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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