Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
