i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
