so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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