I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
