I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
You are the jesus of drinking
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
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