Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
