She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
