Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
