Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize
