I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
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