Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
grandma shit on top of the toilet
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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