its not stalking. its research.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
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