I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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