you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
