he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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