One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
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